Aries
Are you sitting pretty? You probably think so, but check the mirror. It might be one of those from a fairground- you could be fatter than you think Actually, you are fatter than you think, but let’s not get personal.
Time to move on. Clear out all that has been holding you back and be ready for that fresh start. Don’t look back- you might walk into a lamppost, and that can hurt. With a skull as thick as yours, it may not do the lamppost any good, either.
June is a time to find out what you want. But as the sign of the Twins, will it be what you want or what you want? When you have decided- go for it, but make sure you’re fit- you may have two ways to go.
The Solar Eclipse is in your sign on the 21st. This could bring the major changes that you have been waiting for, changing your life forever. Look out for a tall woman with dark eyes and a machete. Could present a risk.
Be on your guard on the 6th, 8th and 11th. Watch out on the 15th, 21st, 24th and 30th. Don’t trust someone who smiles a lot. Friends may try to take advantage of you. Avoid negative feelings.
Mercury turns retrograde on the 6th, and you know what that means. So I don’t have to tell you. So I won’t. Don’t make any decisions unless you have decided to.
June is the ideal time for committing yourself permanently to a partner. Not the best at making decisions- in fact sitting on the fence is your favourite resting place- this time you will have to say yes, because people will be watching.
Venus enters Taurus and the Solar Eclipse occurs. See what happens when you’re not looking? Start again- moving to a foreign country offers you renewed possibilities of fame and fortune. Think of all those millions you could make. Unless you get caught.
Who are you thinking of, that should not be in your thoughts at all? Yes, you know who I mean. Don’t do it. The Solar Eclipse says don’t do it. I say don’t do it. And all you can think is- do what?
Quit acting the goat. Make your mind up, you can’t stand still, even if you do time marches on and you will never get it back. So be brave, stand up and be counted, carpe diem and ignore clichés.
Put on that slinky red or black dress, the high heels and the lip gloss. Time to show everyone what you’re really like, the true fun loving side of you. And if your wife won’t lend you her cloths- no worries, borrow some from a friend.
There is a lot of fun around in your chart for this month. But a word of warning, just because something makes you laugh, is appealing and seems so cute, doesn’t mean that it can’t give you a serious nip. Beware of things with sharp teeth.
What can go wrong this month? You’re happy, partners are more relaxed than ever and even work seems fun. You exude confidence and happiness and everyone wants to be near you. And the Tooth Fairy is giving Green Shield stamps. So it’s the same as usual, eh?