My wife's gone to the West Indies. Jamaica? No, she went of her own accord.
My wife's gone to Indonesia. Jakarta? No, she took a plane!
My wife's gone to the Indian coast. Goa? Phwoar! I'll say!
My wife's gone to St Petersburg. Is she Russian? No, she's taking her time.
My wife's gone to Northern Italy. Genoa? I should think so, we've been married for 20 years.
My wife's had an accident on a volcano. Krakatoa? No. She broke her leg.
My wife's gone mad in Venezuela. Caracas? Yes, absolutely loopy
My wife's gone to the Welsh border. Wye? Search me.
My wife's gone to the botanical gardens. Kew? Yes, it was rather busy.
My wife's gone to Malawi. Lilongwe? Yes, about 5000 miles
My wife's got an upset tummy in Laos. Inkhazi? Yes, constantly.
My wife's gone to see relatives in France. Nice? (...need I say more...)
My wife's gone on a singing tour of South Korea. Seoul? No, R and B
My wife had an accident in Slovenia. Bled? Like a stuck pig.
My wife's parents are from Croatia. Split? No, they're still happily married.
My wife went to a very bad concert in South East Asia. Singapore? Terrible. And the rest of the band was even worse.
My wife went on a sailing course in Poole. In Dorset? Yes, she'd recommend it to anyone.